Welcome to the Suicide Guide. This is a place for you! Here I'll be posting stories, advice, news, etc from people like you! It doesn't matter how depressed you are, what medications you're on, who you are, how many hardships you've had, because I and many others want to hear what you have to say. It's a community where you are safe to express what you've been through. Other people NEED know that they aren't alone! They genuinely need your help to shed light on what they're going through so that they aren't afraid or ashamed of what they have or who they are.
Just a couple months ago, I was terrified. I live in a Mormon family with three siblings and two awesome parents. Depression hit me hard. I was so confused because I really had nothing to be sad about. It made me even more upset, and made me feel stupid. But depression can be caused by many things. (In my case, a chemical imbalance did the trick.)
My parents felt guilty, my medications weren't working, and then the suicidal thoughts came into play. Having those urges demolished any self esteem I had left. I hated myself. I thought I was selfish, and destined for failure as the thoughts got worse and worse.
September 19th, 2016 the thoughts were unbearable. I went into my backyard, laid down on the grass and blasted "5 Years" by David Bowie (who is a GOD) and tried to replay a happy memory connected to that song in my head in order to block out the thoughts. I was out there until dark still trying to block them out but it was no use. My brain kept trying to find means to end myself, where I should do it, what my note should say, what I'd be wearing.
My Dad came out and found me in my bad shape. My parents were very reluctant to send me to a hospital (especially my Mumsy) due to their fears of me being in someone else's hands. But my dad finally asked if that's what needed to happen.
I had never heard about being admitted to a mental hospital for suicidal thoughts before. The only knowledge of mental institutions I had came from scary movies. But I knew that they'd be nothing like that. (HAHA! That will be discussed later...)
My point is, I was immensely afraid. I thought I was alone. I thought that I would never get better because nothing seemed to be working. I hadn't a single clue as to what was going on in my head.
Today I wish so badly that back then there was a place for me to learn about others who had my same problems. Learn how they coped, or even how they didn't. Learn what's happened to them over the years.
So I've decided to start it.
Send YOUR story, tips, advice, ANYTHING that you've created artistically tied to this subject, or you have any other ideas you want to shoot at me to:
